Arthur

This is Arthur. [He pauses for a beat.] I'm looking for any familiar faces, so if you're out there, drop me a line.

[Especially you, Ariadne.]

[ooc: lolol this is the most low effort post; I'm sorry.]

Someone want to tell me what the hell happened? Not the short version; I want the details.

How long was I gone?

[SPAM for Perry Dawsey]
[As soon as he gets his answers, Arthur heads over to Perry's room and knocks on the door. Between Perry's coma and Arthur's temporary departure from the Barge, a meeting's long overdue.]

[OOC: For reference, Arthur disappeared shortly into the Reboot event because he either got sucked out a window or sucked out of one of the panels.]

I have to say, I'm glad the kitchen's back in business. Although there's food in my cabin, I prefer having somebody else do the cooking for me. Plus, it was good to get out of my room, since Narvin's completely accurate accusations last night are making it really difficult for me and Ariadne to have sex. It ruined the mood almost as badly as the time I killed her.

I'm going to head to the library now, even though I'm not really a librarian and only said I was one so that people wouldn't know I'm a career criminal who violates people's minds for money. I'd rather be in the shooting range, where I can pretend the targets are whoever set the hallucinogen off in the dining hall-- not because I care about what happens to about 90% of you, but because it hit Ariadne.

I sometimes wonder if I'm a bad person.

Anyway, be sure to bring any overdue books in, so that I can organize them while quietly judging your taste in reading material.

[Arthur points the camera at the mistletoe above his door.]

I probably don't have to warn any of you about this, but just in case: be careful around the mistletoe. It does exactly what you might expect it to do.

[He turns the camera to himself and gives a wry look.] So, if you need me, be sure to back away from the door after knocking.

[Private to Perry]
Sorry I've been scarce. [Is he going to explain why he's been scarce? NOPE.] We should talk about that last port. You free?

[Thank god Arthur's all grown up again. He's recording from his cabin, which is looking a little trashed, but is clearly in the process of a cleanup.]

I think that was, hands down, the most embarrassing flood the Barge has ever thrown at me. I'll take being four-legged and furry over being thirteen again any day.

[Awkward pause. Okay, time to just man up and apologize. He clears his throat.]

Sorry to everyone I ran into. [Especially Narvin.] I was a pain in the ass at that age. [He shrugs.] Hormones.

I'll clean up the... [And now he looks a little embarrassed. Is that a wince?] doors I egged now.

[Private to Perry]
You know, you weren't a bad kid. [Starting this off by saying something nice... And now:] Come by my cabin after dinner. We're due for a talk.

[OOC: Threads with teen Arthur are still playing out (and I need to tag into a few) and will be hit up this evening, but I wanted to get this up in a relatively timely manner. Anyway, feel free to say your door was one of the ones he egged, if you feel so inclined.]

You know, I can't help but agree with the quote "Four legs good, two legs better" right now. I'm glad to be back to normal; this place smelled way too... [What's a nice way of putting this?] robust to my senses.

But for the record, I still don't see what's wrong with being a dog. Dobermans are intelligent and hard-working. [LIKE ARTHUR, SO THERE.]

[Private to Prefect + Perry]
There are some papers missing from my room. [Which would either contain false identities or research on fellow Bargemates. Either way, it's kind of suspicious stuff and he wants it back.] I'd like them back, and I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone about them.

[Warden Filter + Perry]
My inmate, Perry Dawsey, is officially cut off from alcohol. Please don't take him to the bar or give him anything, not even one beer. If he does manage to get in there, I'd expect the bartenders not to serve him unless he's with me.

And if you have an inmate who's friends with him? [Which Arthur kind of doubts. PERRY HAS NO FRIENDS.] Try to keep on top of their interactions, and I'll do the same from my end.

[Private to the Admiral]
Remove all the alcohol from Perry's room.

[Private to Perry]
From now on, the only drinking you're doing is with me.

This is just a reminder that the Salvation House soup kitchen could use a few more volunteers. I'll be there tonight. I hope to see some familiar faces around, too.

We've got a great city here, but remember: under the glitz and glam, there are a lot of people out there facing hard times-- a lot of them drunks. Maybe if you see their faces, get to know them, it won't be so easy to head to the gin mills. [Which Arthur knows you're totally doing right under his nose. TEMPERANCE, PEOPLE.]

[SPAM]
[Officer Arthur (everyone's on a first-name basis with him, okay) is making the rounds on his beat today. Say hello to him, citizens! Or, if you're involved in a life of crime, run away. Unless you're one of the little urchin orphans, in which case he'll probably give you a nickel or dime for information (and a cool 50 cents if you look particularly hungry) and send you on your way.]

[OOC: LOL I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT PLAYING A COP WHO ISN'T SAM TYLER. Anyway, Officer Arthur is an earnest, idealistic cop, who just wants to serve Lady Justice, okay. He won't go after any crooks without EVIDENCEEEE, so feel free to troll him if you're a scumbag who's just out of his reach /fist shake

Actually, just troll him anyway. He's too earnest.]

[Arthur's voice sounds hard and determined.]

I'm going to find Ariadne. [And if he happens to find other people, he'll help them, but Arthur's no hero.] I know some of you are already out there looking, so if you find any clues, let me know. I'll do the same for you.

Anyone wants to come with me, they can. But I'm going now.

And Perry. I could use your help. [He won't force you, but it's STRONGLY RECOMMENDED.]

[OOC: So I think what's going to happen is Arthur and Perry are going to coordinate with Faith to try to get to where Ariadne and whoever else is being kept? If anyone wants to get in on this failed rescue mission and find themselves dead or gladiator'd when it goes wrong, hop into this post.]