paradoxlol | .011

I can't be the only person here with a wardrobe full of dry-clean only clothing. Considering the laundry room isn't exactly equipped to take care of it, what methods have the rest of you been using?

[Private to Mindy]
We're overdue for a meeting. Level 6 common room, after dinner. NOT OPTIONAL.

[Filtered to Hayley & Capa]
I want you to tell me everything you remember about port. [He figures he doesn't need to specify which port.] In person, preferably.

[Filtered to Miss Parker, added later]
You're on inventory, right? And congratulations, on graduating. I know it's belated.

[OOC: Like so many, Arthur's going to pretend the flood never happened. That's right, he's not even going to give a cursory "WELL THAT SUCKED." The only indication that he's pissy is the fact that, well, EVERYTHING'S TEXT BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU JERKS. Also, his hideous solicitation post is now retroactively encrypted-- well, Arthur-encrypted. He's probably decent, but not better than any of the tech types here.

ALSO. He's hanging out in the laundry room right now, sitting on a machine that he accidentally overloaded with all of his bedding ~~because it's unclean~~. Fun Fact: Arthur doesn't actually do his own laundry back home. SO HE IS IGNORANT and has been barely scraping by on the Barge. SO IF YOU WANT TO HANG OUT WITH HIM, SPAM AWAY.

And sorry for the crap post. I have awful writer's block today.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[This face. Is his face right now. Good thing the Master can't see it.]

I'm not in "customer service," you know.

[And he's so not answering that question, because answering would only acknowledge the flood. Arthur's determined not to do that.]

[It is a pretty fantastic face.]

You won't get much repeat business with that attitude.

And between you, me, and the bedpost? I know one customer who could use some repeat business.

[Eventually, he will hit a flood that makes him fall into bed with someone randomly, and this will not seem quite so lolarious.]

I really don't need to hear about anybody else's sex life. Keep it to yourself.

[And then Arthur will LAUGH AND LAUGH-- silently and professionally.]

You're right. I'm sure yours keeps you more than occupied.

I'm impressed with your Admiral. Non-consensual sex between wardens as a rehabilitation tool for inmates. He thinks outside the box.

Keep speculating. It's nobody's business, least of all yours. If you're building up to a bigger point, just spit it out. Otherwise, this conversation's over.

My point is, there is no point. Whatever's in charge here is as sadistic as any of us inmates.

I don't know you, and I don't know how you treat your ward. But we're your allies, not your enemies.

Explain how you're my ally. Are you planning on helping my inmate graduate? My guess is "no." [And since Arthur's only here for that reason... he's pretty much a totally selfish bastard about the overall state of the Barge.]

You'd have more luck working with your inmate if you didn't turn into a gigolo every other weekend, yes?

Or did that help the graduation process along?

And the only way to stop that is to put somebody else in charge, right? Because the Admiral certainly won't stop on his own.

Is that you suspecting me?

Look, I really don't care. If you want this to be how you live your life, ignore a little casual violation Sat.-Sun. for the sake of your deal—that's a lifestyle choice. I'm modern. I won't judge.

But I think we can do better.

No, that's me asking a question so that I can get more out of you than platitudes about unity with no specific solutions. Careful, you're beginning to sound like a warden. Or a politician.

Guilty as charged.

And I'll be honest. For you. I don't have a specific solution. But I know that as long as it's foxes and hounds, wardens and inmates, you against me, no one will have one.

I'm an inmate. You're a warden. We have no reason to care about each other, because this ship says we don't.

But I won't kill you. I won't hurt you. I won't even needle my warden about you.

What do you do on this ship? Anything?

[There's a pause for a few minutes as he considers, then he responds.]

Okay, you have my attention. Tentatively. Right now? I'm just another warden. I used to run the library, while the Doctor was away.

Edited 2010-11-02 19:01 (UTC)

That's all I can ask for.

Are you a friend of the Doctor's?

[HE CAN WORK WITH FRIENDS OF THE DOCTOR. Maybe. If he has to. They might have Doctor cooties, though :|]

No. I only spoke with him a few times.

[COOTIES AVERTED.]

He's not trustworthy. [Says the super-hypocrite.]

How long have you been here? I'm new. Two months, odd.

Why not? The same, actually. Two months. Enough time to see how things run-- or don't-- around here.

I've known him for centuries. He serves his own interests.

Then you've seen how little difference there is between the two classes. We're the same. If you're our way out, we're yours, and the ship's against us.

Do you have any special skills? We need to use everything we have to learn more, and to protect ourselves.

I was a research librarian before I got here. For the New York Public Library. My skills tend towards books and information.

[Okay, he will not be remarking on how useless being good with books seems on the Barge. If Arthur had said 1337 h4x0r, he would be much more interested.]

[On second thought, nah, he will remark.]

Books.

[SORRY BRO, he won't tell you about his mind raping skillz until AT LEAST the third date.]

Books. Is there something wrong with that?

[And the Master gets distracted by, let's say, the Seventh Doctor appearing at the end of the hall he's texting from, and takes evasive action. By the time he's finished ~~running scared~~ gracefully retreating, his attention span has wandered. Thread-dropping. The least of his evils.]

[He'll remember you seem like you have potential, though, Arthur. For a warden.]

.011 | Text.

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text]

[Private - Text] ...I want that on an icon, now.

[Private - Text] Somebody must make it happen

[Private - Text] I am far too lazy! Woo~ I have no idea where I'm going with this thread, either.

[Private - Text] NOR I.

[Private - Text] This is what happens when you thread because you're bored at work.

[Private - Text] Yeah, I confess... I was in the same boat. GO OFFICE JOBS.

[Pseudo-Spam] They are just that fantastic, office jobs.