.020 | Video.

[paradoxlol]

[Arthur's in his study/at-home office, and he's got the camera on his fancy iPhone thingie on him, so you get a nice close-up view of his LOVELY LADY FACE. Thanks to some tips from Mal, he's got some tasteful makeup on to complement his stylish outfit. He looks a little grim, but he's gotten over his initial sulking.]

This is Arthur. Or... [He makes a slight face.] Annette Arthur-Capa. Might as well come out now, so you know who I am if you pass me in the street. Now, it looks like... [He shifts and leans forward, reaching across his desk to grab his planner.] I'm already pretty acquainted with most of you. It seems that Annette-- me-- is a... somewhat accomplished therapist, judging by the number of clients here. [He looks down and arches a brow, impressed.] Not to mention the hourly rates.

[Smirking.]

Looks like I'm the breadwinner, Capa.

[Back to business.]

Anyway, Annette's specializes in interpersonal relationships. Marriage counseling and... [Ergh.] sex therapy. Judging by the names in this book, a lot of you don't exactly have rosy marriages. My assistant will probably leave you all a message if she hasn't already, but I thought I'd spare you the shock of finding out you're in couple's counseling from a stranger by forwarding your appointments to you privately.

[He leans forward, giving the camera a stern look.] By the way, I've got a family to feed, so I do expect to be paid.

[Private Texts to: WHOEVER WANTS MARRIAGE COUNSELING, listing the time, date and location of services.]

[OOC: I WILL POST UP A LOG FOR ARTHUR'S COUNSELING SESSIONS SOON. They can take place at any time during port. But first... there will be a grocery store log. ALL ARE FREE TO JOIN IN.]

Comments

[ourlastbesthope.livejournal.com]

[From the kitchen:]

At the moment, I believe I'm the one feeding the family.

[paradoxlol]

I give it thirty minutes before you order takeout.

[ourlastbesthope.livejournal.com]

Don't underestimate my cooking abilities.

Of course, you don't have to eat it.

[paradoxlol]

Oh, no, I'm eating it. I refuse to be one of those women who do all the work out of the house and in.

[ourlastbesthope.livejournal.com]

All the work? I work! [And now he leaves the pot to simmer before stalking into the office.]

I...am a painter. Apparently a good one. And I give lessons. Sometimes. [Yeah, he has absolutely no real argument against that...]

[paradoxlol]

[Arthur puts some papers aside and stands up, hands on his hips, arching a skeptical brow.]

Sometimes. [He smirks.] What're you going to do when your first student pops by?

[ourlastbesthope.livejournal.com]

[That required some thought.]

Hope that they are familiar. Barring that, I'll just watch them paint for a while. [SEE, he has plans. He leaned against the doorframe casually.]

What do you plan to do when you're at work? Surely you don't think you're going to successfully counsel these people? [And...sex therapy? Capa couldn't comprehend that.]

[paradoxlol]

Simple. I'll write in a notepad while they talk about themselves. Every once in a while, I'll interject with "How does that make you feel?"

[ourlastbesthope.livejournal.com]

[That...basically summed up how Capa saw any type of therapy. So he could accept that. But he couldn't resist, as he was walking out, to mutter flippantly:]

If they knew how they were supposed to feel, they wouldn't be going to you for sex therapy.

[Yeah, Capa had definitely been spending way too much time on the Barge.]

[paradoxlol]

Yeah, well, don't complain. It got us this house. [He shot Capa a look, then smirked.] Which you painted.

[Then, he held up his schedule book.] By the way, we've got an appointment, too. Date night.

[ourlastbesthope.livejournal.com]

[That stopped Capa fully and he sighed. Trust Arthur to just...throw himself headfirst into all of this. Somehow, he knew not to ask if it was possible to skip it. So he pretended to be casual.]

When?

[paradoxlol]

Tomorrow. [He arches an eyebrow.] Shall I leave the details up to you, or do some more detective work to see what we've already got planned?

[ourlastbesthope.livejournal.com]

I think I can handle figuring that much out on my own, darling. [This might not be a real relationship, but like hell he was going to be completely whipped by his fake wife.]

It'll be a nice surprise.

[paradoxlol]

[Arthur wasn't the biggest fan of surprises, but he still managed to let out a somewhat deadpan:] I can't wait.

[ourlastbesthope.livejournal.com]

[Capa resisted the urge for a childish eyeroll before turning and heading out.]

It will be ready in thirty minutes.

[Private | Text]

[most_feared]

It looks like Karl and Natasha are having problems. We can use it as an opportunity for a first person debriefing. [YES HE WAS LIKE THIS EVEN AS A NUETRAL!]

[Private | Text]

[paradoxlol]

I can look over my case notes and give you guys some pointers on your roles. Annette was nothing if not organized.

[Private | Text]

[most_feared]

Thanks. I'll pass on relevant information to the missus. That's a good look for you by the way, Slick.

[Private | Text]

[paradoxlol]

Ha ha. Give Narvin the same compliment and see how he takes it.

[Private | Text]

[most_feared]

There is a greater chance he will kill me. [He doesn't really believe he'd kill him. Make him miserable for a few days? Quite likely.] Though eventually he should learn the human concept of teasing.

[Private | Text]

[paradoxlol]

Do ANY of the Time Lords know the concept of teasing?

[Private | Text]

[most_feared]

I think the Doctor does, and maybe Omega has learned it. I have a feeling Braxiatel almost teases but it's more like wielding a verbal weapon.

[Private | Text]

[paradoxlol]

I'll be honest, I never really talked to them much.

[Private | Text]

[most_feared]

You should sometime. They're fun in their own way. Same with the vampires. They make your world feel a little bigger.

[Private | Text]

[paradoxlol]

My world feels big enough just being on the Barge.

[Private]

[gimmethemap]

So how does this work exactly?

[Private]

[paradoxlol]

You show up at the scheduled time, sit in a private room with me, and you talk while I listen and steer the conversation.

[timesbureaucrat]

[Narvin/Natasha does not reply but swears in Gallifreyan when he receives the private text. Marriage counselling? *Sex therapy?* He was *not* actually married, thank you and the sex was great, no problems there and even if he were he wouldn't expose his problems to some third party.]

[paradoxlol]

[BUT ARTHUR IS THE PERFECT MEDIATOR, AS HE'S HAD SEX WITH YOU TOO. He can ~understaaaand~]

[timesbureaucrat]

[PROBABLY NOT THE BEST THING TO SAY DURING MARRIAGE COUNSELLING.]

Private - text

[cauchemal]

You're a therapist.

[Be glad you can't see her cracking the hell up, Arthur.]

Private - text

[paradoxlol]

A sex therapist.

[Pause, then HAVE AN EMOTE.]

:\

Private - text

[cauchemal]

I would offer you advice if I had any. My methods for handling such issues with patients—well, they involved avenues not open to you.

Private - text

[paradoxlol]

It would certainly be more efficient.