paradoxlol: (;misc: dreaming)
Arthur ([personal profile] paradoxlol) wrote2011-04-28 10:11 am

Goodbye, Sanity~

Have you known such a savoury grief as I?
Do people say "Strange fellow!," whom you meet?
— My amorous soul, when I was due to die,
Felt longing mixed with horror; pain seemed sweet.
 
Anguish and ardent hope (no factious whim)
Were mixed: and as the sands of life ran low
My torture grew delicious yet more grim,
And of this dear old world would not let go.
|

[There's a long pause in the text, then he switches to voice.]
 
It's Baudelaire.  I can't remember the rest.  I just wanted to share, because... because I woke up, and it was like when you get a song stuck in your head.  An idea that replays over and over again, and you try to get it out, but you can't. [He lets out a soft snort at the thought.  NOT THAT ANYBODY WOULD KNOW, but Arthur's tone sounds more like his normal, pre-Invasion self.]
 
The thing about an idea is... If it isn't yours, you can always trace it back to its genesis.  Your mind-- your mind is-- it's this incredible tool; it retains so much more than you can even comprehend.  Some speculate that you never really forget anything-- you may not recall something, but it's still there, locked inside your head.  You can't, you can't make a person believe in a lie forever, not if you don't go deep enough. [He laughs hollowly]  Any memory can be retrieved. 
 
Anything...
 
[Murmuring:] It's on the tip of my tongue.
 
[He lets out a soft sigh and begins to recite, his voice going flat:]
 
J'étais comme l'enfant avide du spectacle,
Haïssant le rideau comme on hait un obstacle...
Enfin la vérité froide se révéla:

J'étais mort sans surprise, et la terrible aurore
M'enveloppait. — Eh quoi! n'est-ce donc que cela?
La toile était levée et j'attendais encore.

 
That's it.  That's what I was forgetting.
 
[OOC: CUE ARTHUR GOING CRAZY.  Or beginning to.  He knows something's wrong; he knows that he should be able to check that this is reality, but the whole concept of a totem is basically gone, so he's left in a daze.  IF I'M FEELING INTELLIGENT ENOUGH, his comments will become more and more surreal, but if I'm not, he'll just be in a weird malaise.  By tonight/tomorrow, he'll start trying to "kick" his canonmates and himself.  With a gun.  The poem is "The Dream of a Curious Man", and I'm using the second translation here.  OH AND: Arthur's on the deck right now, staring down at the "sea" of stars, so that's where you can find him.]
toldastory: (hope)

Private.

[personal profile] toldastory 2011-04-28 06:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Arthur love, can I come see you?

[identity profile] puzzleprince.livejournal.com 2011-04-28 06:17 pm (UTC)(link)
I'll ignore that implication.

The main feature of your network post was memories. Retrieving them, retaining them. You've clearly lost something to be acting this way.

[Private]

Are you not comfortable with speaking of your loss under the public eye?
Edited 2011-04-28 18:23 (UTC)
batmanschmatman: (Rocking these aviators.)

Private

[personal profile] batmanschmatman 2011-04-28 06:18 pm (UTC)(link)
[Dick's tone changes to be more gently firm.] Arthur, whatever's happening, I can't help unless you give me some specifics. How aren't they matching up?

Private

[identity profile] ourlastbesthope.livejournal.com 2011-04-28 06:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Why are you apologizing to me?
hatestriangles: (/wince)

Private;

[personal profile] hatestriangles 2011-04-28 06:25 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm not lying! What the fuck is wrong with you, Arthur? You're acting crazy, man.
cauchemal: (ha ha no what?)

SPAM

[personal profile] cauchemal 2011-04-28 06:26 pm (UTC)(link)
[She looks at him in confusion, the worried frown deepening on her brow.]

I think I am the same as I was yesterday.

[She takes a step closer, watching his face.]

You, however, seem ... not quite yourself.
toldastory: (necklace)

Private.

[personal profile] toldastory 2011-04-28 06:29 pm (UTC)(link)
I just want to check and see if you're alright. I'm a doctor, and I'm you're friend and I'm here to help.

[identity profile] puzzleprince.livejournal.com 2011-04-28 06:33 pm (UTC)(link)
You wish that were true.
batmanschmatman: (Bruce is cray cray.)

Private

[personal profile] batmanschmatman 2011-04-28 06:43 pm (UTC)(link)
[I KNOW TOO MUCH ABOUT EXTRACTION SENSE IS TINGLING.] What do you think is going on?
cauchemal: (oh shit)

SPAM

[personal profile] cauchemal 2011-04-28 06:43 pm (UTC)(link)
[Mal goes white as a sheet—shock and anger and alarm all at once. What she did to Cobb? Does he mean all of the horror after Limbo, her own death and everything around it? She clenches her fists at her side, quelling the urge to strike him for his terrible words, and takes a deep breath, trying to speak calmly.]

Arthur. What are you saying? I know it's not easy, and I know you're still his friend, but— [She shakes her head in protest.] I will never hurt you, Arthur.

[identity profile] puzzleprince.livejournal.com 2011-04-28 06:50 pm (UTC)(link)
There are people suffering similar losses, myself included. It's not coincidental.

I suggest you seek counsel from a friend.

Page 3 of 5